Feeling so drain out...
Feeling so sick...
Feeling so neglected...
Feeling so given up...
I shouldn't have been like this.... but i just couldn't hold myself up alone...
"when time to let go, it's time to do so... sacrifise needed"
through these days, although i'm alone... i tell myself to stay strong for myself, for who i am... no matter how my mum make it hard on me... i'm sick and tired of it now... seeing her, talking to her is nothing anymore... when i see her phone number or the house number... i wouldn't feel like listening...
Through those few days, i manage to find some company... well, thanks brother hui min, i had lunch with him at sakae;) hahas... my favourite sushi buffet!!! hahas... "for so long that we're together, do u know wad i like to eat?" nvm...
after the buffet, i went back home becoz i wasn't feeling well... nowadays getting sick so easily... hahas... WEAK!!! and pandemic flu is coming soon! so please prepare guys... dun get infected... and i'm not infected... i just heard the news about it...
watching Full House Drama makes myself broke down time and time again... it was kinda funny that day... russell bought prata to eat... but i didn't eat... on diet? hmmm... wad happen was that i snatch his plate and cut the prata into small pieces... i didn't know why... but when russell look at me... he say: "are you crazy? do i look like i dun know how to cut?" hahas... then i was laughing... but laughing was just the surface of how i reacted... but after that went home alone with russell, i told him... the reason why i cut those prata into small pieces is becoz thats wad i use to do for someone in the past... he knows who i'm referring to:) anyway, he understand and he said, next time dun do that again... becoz he's hungry... hahas...
then stay back the other days back in school to do assignments and do my life science test... hahas.. i've got 45/100... isn't that amazing? perhaps life sciences isn't wad i should persue in... i feel that life science course no longer stay a part of my life now... and i'm joining another course... crazy? i think so...
today went to braddell heights to train again... was kinda tired before that... coz i went out with brother min... ya? and i had to leave home early again:( coz wasn't feeling well... then had panadol under circumstances of being forced to... and drop down on the bed to take a rest before i go to the court... so 8pm reached the court and started playing... wasn't playing well becoz wasn't really strong enough... was being lectured by the people... saying that i've no guts... hahas... yesh... i do think so too... i dun know why, but i'm going weaker each and everyday... lack of sleep? lack of rest? lack of wad? i have no idea... but i think i'll break down one day soon...
breaking down is a part of parcel and life... but when u climb up and walk through the hurdles that come in your way, try to either stand firm in where u are, or overcome it... so that u won't fear... i'm so tired now that my eyes are swollen... hahas... and enjoy everyone? i dun wanna talk more coz the more i do, the more i feel so fed up with myself in the things i'm limited to do...
looking at this picture... wad can u read from it?
"even if its just a small house, i dun mind... it fits me and is able for me to run away from memories?(:"
photo taken at kiddy palace...
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